You can read the guide below or pick one up at the venue

The Menfriends Beginners Guide
Christchurch's Premium Venue for Men

Its OK to be nervous!

A first time visit to a place like Menfriends can be a bit scary - most guys find it a bit of a challenge.  Sooner or later you will get up the nerve to visit us and then you'll wonder why it took you so long!  On your first visit, take your time to look around the venue, see how things work and try to relax.  Remember - YOU are in control at all times; our Team are available for assistance or advice at any time.

What Menfriends is about

Menfriends Sauna is a two floor time-out space for guys where you can relax and be yourself, socially and sexually.  Menfriends offers social space as well as space and facilities for hook-ups without questions.  What happens inside stays inside and what you do is up to you.  That can something or nothing..your choice the whole way.  Everyone is coming from their own direction sexually - that's good with us and should be good with you as well.  It's about respecting other guys and what they are in to.  We are a no-alcohol venue and cater to any male over the age of 16.

Upon Arrival

When you first arrive at Menfriends you will be issued a large fresh towel and a key to a locker for your clothes and personal items. If it is a first-time visit, tell the Receptionist this when you arrive.  He will point you in the right direction and explain where things are.  He is also there to answer any questions you might have in the back of your mind.

Next, go to your locker and get sorted. Get rid of excess clothing and wear whatever you are comfortable with wearing; just remember our Dress Code. Most guys strip right off and wrap a towel around their waist but you are welcome to stay fully dressed if you'd prefer.

Menfriends is spread over 2 floors. Now’s the time to go explore the whole place to get your bearings. You might get ‘distracted’ during your look around but if not, a hot shower and a spa is a good way to start your visit.

There are two ways to utilise Menfriends - sexually and socially.  Try to do both if you can spare the time and go at your own pace. A usual visit is 1-2 hours - if you can only spare 20 minutes your chances of hooking up are greatly reduced. Try to give the venue a chance to work for you - good things sometimes take time.

When your visit is over, please return your towel and locker key to Reception.

 
Other guys and you

You  can  do whatever  you  want  sexually.   If  that  is  with  another  guy  then  it  should  be  with  a  guy  that  you  want  to  be  with.  You  don't  have to  go  with  the  first  or  any  guy  that  hits  on  you.   If  you  strike  a  guy  that  just  wont  leave  you  alone  or  take  a  hint,  please  advise  one of our Team  members.  They  will  help discreetly. You  do  not  have  to  put  up  with  someone  crowding  you.   A  guy  is  entitled  to  ask TWICE— you  may  change  your  mind!  More than  twice  WE  consider  harassment  -  so  should  you!  You  can  say  “no”  at  ANY  time.    At  Menfriends  it's cool  to  be  sexual  and  explore  it  for  real,  alone  or  with  someone  else.  Many guys on a first time visit go solo to break the ice.  Solo  is  cool  too!

 
Make the most from your visit

Try to balance your visit. There are lots of things to do at Menfriends and variety is the key to enjoying your time. Surf the internet or catch a movie, soak in the spa sauna or steam, read a mag, the newspaper and relax over a free coffee.

Your chances of meeting someone are a lot better if you move about.

 
Hooking Up - how to

1. Eye contact - if your look is returned - a good sign! If he ignores you - he’s probably not interested. If he’s looking at you, that’s a good sign he’s keen.

2. If you find a hand on your cock in the Spa pool you can safely assume he’s interested!  If you are not interested say so, move away or move the hand away.

3. Some guys like to charm others with words - beware the guy who thinks just because you listen to him you are also keen on him.  If you are keen on him, respond accordingly. Not everyone who talks to you wants to lay you however - learn to spot the difference.

4. Gentle touching or brushing against a person when passing is a good start - if they respond, that's a good sign.

5. NEVER look sad! Being off your face is a guarantee you will be left alone and you probably wont be admitted.

6. Sometimes it just happens and you didn't have to do anything at all!

 

. . . it doesn’t matter if you’re gay, bisexual , don't know, or don’t care

what matters is that you can be sexual and be yourself.

Our Dress Code:   Any of these:     1. Towel     2. Towel and ‘top’   3. Fully clothed   4. Fetish

 If you see a guy you fancy - let him know - he cannot read your mind

SAFE Sex - Using a ‘rubber’

Never let anyone convince you to have sex without a condom - it could cause complications in your life that you just don't need. Yes, most guys would rather have sex without a condom and sometimes you will find that YOU are the hardest person to convince - especially if he’s hot.  At the end of the day, it's up to you.  A good way to get sexually comfortable with using a condom is by jacking-off regularly with one on - it's fun too! See our FAQ section on this website about our weekly free and anonymous Sexual Health Checks.  They are very professionally run, free and totally anonymous which is good if you don't want the whole world knowing your personal business. 

 
Your Privacy

We will guard your privacy at all times during your visit and it's a good idea to guard your own until your are certain. When you first meet someone, they only know the guy in front of them.  If you want it to stay that way, we urge caution in giving out your personal details. Make someone earn your trust in this regard and if they are keen they will wait until you are ready to divulge those kind of details. We will not take phone messages, take phone calls or pass on messages for any client for any reason.  While you are in Menfriends, as far as the outside world is concerned you do not exist.

 

Our Team

Our team is here to run the venue and ensure it remains a safe clean place to relax and play for everyone.  It can be a tough job at times so Team members deserve your respect and compliance with any reasonable request.  Please remember they are responsible for the venue and everyone in it, not just one individual.            

 

 other useful tips . . .

 

~ Be realistic in your expectations. Sometimes Mr Right will be here and you get lucky, other times Mr Right Now will do.


~ In dark area's walk slowly until your eye’s adjust to the light level.

~ An open door is an invitation to come in - but no obligations are implied. The guy inside still has a choice.

~ Loud talking/conversations are discouraged in sexual spaces - it's very off-putting for guys getting it on.

~ If you want it all to happen inside 20 minutes you are probably in the wrong place.  It might - but don’t count on it.  Try to allow 1-2 hours per visit.

~ Dress Codes stated in Special Sessions are not optional - which is why they are so popular! If you can’t handle it - please wait until you can, you’ll enjoy it then.

~ If someone says “no”, it's their loss not yours. Never take it personally. "NO" means "NO" - get over it and move on.

~ Smoking - there's nothing like a smoke before or after in the heated outdoor area.

~ Dont encourage pick-pockets. Leave your valuables at Reception.

~ Cellphone use is discouraged but we would ask for considerate use when necessary.

~ Pass Outs are available on all Entry's. If you need to leave the building you can return FREE at anytime within the same session.